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Heart of Gold or Stone?

Posted on August 26, 2020 at 9:40 AM Comments comments (19323)

There is a view that we inherit our basic nature from our ancestors where the two hearts of our parents are uniquely combined into one and this is often likened to the two halves of their hearts.


Another view is that we all have a Golden heart and a Stone heart. The Golden heart represents all that is good in human nature; such as generosity, kindness, gentleness, loving, caring, and warmth while the Stone heart represents all that is not so good; such as controlling, unkindness, harshness, hating, uncaring, and coldness.


We may be open to the idea that the Golden heart displays the divine human nature while the Stone heart exhibits beastly human nature that get triggered under the perceived threat. For many people, the heart of Gold prevails most of the time but the Stone heart is triggered when the fear kicks in, while for some others, the Golden heart is hidden mostly, if not permanently, by the Stone heart. This domination of the Stone heart may well have resulted from the negative life experiences in the past, and in the extreme cases, the Stone heart of vindictiveness may prevail. And it is up to us to turn that negative life experiences to overcome it or at least, keep it under control.

We may also be open to the idea that the Golden heart breeds actions that foster positive emotions like pure love, joy, peace and compassion while the Stone heart breeds actions that foster fearful emotions like jealousy & envy, resentment & hatred, and vindictiveness. However, arising from our uniqueness, we may also notice that those actions that foster the positive emotions in one person may not always foster positive emotions in others, in fact, more often than not, they may be misinterpreted or misunderstood and invite unintended consequences that may trigger fear in others.


Thus, the self healing journey is about becoming our own hero in conquering the Stone heart within us, restoring the Golden heart while being aware of the uniqueness in everyone. Others may inspire us or influence us but ultimately we all have to do it ourselves.


No matter the origin of the Stone heart, it is up to us to overcome it, and we can do it with the help of our own Golden heart.




Kyung Yi-O'Kelly

Your Partner in Our Healing Journey


A Self healing journey to freedom, Envisioning a world where everyone thrives

Posted on June 3, 2019 at 11:05 AM Comments comments (2735)

Hi there,

My name is Kyung, I’m a healer & coach and I’ve been helping courageous individuals restore their inner light, divine spark since 2009. I am the creator of holistic healing meditation program and also the author of 7 holistic practices for harmonious living, a self healing journey to freedom.  My intention today is to share with you my findings on this journey so far.


You may be wondering, Freedom from what? I mean Freedom from anything that is keeping me from being and feeling my best in this moment and doing my best knowing that all is well and that all my needs will be met today, and my desires, if not today, tomorrow or someday in the future but most importantly knowing that we are all dearly loved as we do so for each other.    And any discomfort we may be feeling right now will pass when we work on healing it.


In my self healing journey, I found that practice of yoga, meditation, taichi/gi-gong, dance and martial arts are all very good in that besides being fun, they helped me to create space in my body & mind, becoming aware of my thoughts and emotions in my state of being so that I can discern the right action to take at any given moment, so that I can be in touch with my intuition, my inner guidance.


And I also found that the way I see (or perceive) this world proceeded all that followed in my life experience, so the idea of envisioning a world where everyone thrives was born.


And now, you may be wondering, everyone thriving? Yes, I mean, we can imagine and envision everyone being alive and doing the best one can or being the best one can be and that may be very different from one person to the next.


As divine sparks, no matter what condition we are in human form, we are divine light beings of pure love, pure joy & pure peace, way beyond this physical form, but at the same time, we exist in duality on earth; in light & dark, good and evil, masculine & feminine, rich & poor, sickness & wellness, love & hate, inside and outside, and we may notice how unique each and every one of us is in this human form, each with unique talents or gifts, and each one facing unique challenges, yet we all experience this reality through our physical senses in the same way by seeing, hearing, smelling, tasting, touching and feeling. We each have unique likes & dislikes and tend to gravitate towards like minded people, towards those who support our views, and turn away from those who do not. And, we feel good when others agree & support our views but not so good when they do not. When this happens we are identifying ourselves with being in this limited human form and the thoughts & emotions that arise from being attached to all that we are by being human, by our needs & desires.


So in my healing journey, rising beyond good & evil meant, first accepting all that is as is, including myself and everyone around me, as I am and as they are, thereby healing all that is not at ease within myself at any given moment. This has helped me in discerning that which I can and cannot control, so that I can choose to focus my attention on that which I can control. Whenever I find myself unable to do so, I embrace myself, embracing duality that is within myself, to heal and let go.


And as I did so, I realized that the reality I was experiencing was my own creation and that I had the power to control my life experiences, that I could rise beyond duality that is within me, and awaken myself from the world of black & white to a colorful world of diversity, beauty and abundance.


Join me on our self healing journey to freedom, let us envision a world where everyone thrives!



Kyung Yi-O'Kelly

PS This picture was actually created by my 8 year old granddaughter, Berlin, coloring the truck pattern inspired by the pictures of colorful trucks from Pakistan.

Prayer to end suffering on Earth

Posted on February 18, 2018 at 9:35 AM Comments comments (6954)

Prayer to end suffering on earth

May those who are hungry find healthy food to eat

May those who are homeless find comfortable homes to live

May those who are lonely find their companions

May those who are hurt heal fast

May those who are sick recover their health

May those who are grieving let go of their attachment

May those who are in pain, anger, and fear heal themselves

May those who are discouraged recover their courage

May all find clarity, balance, focus, and confidence to live their passion with grace and ease

May love, joy, and peace prevail on earth forever.

Gift Exchange - sharing our gifts, talents and abilities to the fullest

Posted on February 13, 2018 at 1:40 PM Comments comments (7798)

Gift Exchange - sharing our passion, talents and abilities to the fullest

The idea of Gift Exchange came to me when I started envisioning a world where everyone thrives. Living in a world where everyone is leading a fulfilling life doing what they love, that is, sharing their passion, talents and abilities that they choose with the world and meet their needs and desires at the same time, and spreading joy & compassion in the process.

After our first gathering for the book launch, it became apparent that there are mixed understanding and interpretation of the word “gift” and that there is a need to clarify the meaning used in the "Gift Exchange" before moving forward with it.

According to the English dictionary, the word “gift”, has two or double meanings that is at the source of this confusion;

  1. the first is where  a gift is something, time or material, that is given without compensation, and
  2. the other is where a gift is somthing you possess within yourself, your passion, talent or abilities that you love to do, be or create

In Korean, there exist two completely separate words to describe the two different meanings so there is no confusion there.  The 선물 is to mean those goods or services that you give or receive for free while 재능 is the ability you have that you are good at or you enjoy doing, being or creating.

It is the second meaning that the word “gift” is used in Gift Exchange and Gift Exchang Circle. It's confusing in English because the term or phrase “Gift Exchange” is typically used as the first meaning.   And here is another example to hightlight the difference.  When I was growing up, whenver someone gave us a gift, 선물, my mother always made sure that we repay them by giving them a gift in  another form of similar monatary value so in that sense, for me, the 선물, the gift received for free is never free because it always creates that obligation to pay back.  Whereas the 재능, the gift (passion, talent or abilitiy) I share, I feel I deserve to receive the best that life offers and enjoy all that comes my way with gratitude, knowing that all my needs and desires are being met, and spreading joy & compassion in the process.

A Gift Exchange circle is a group coming together with intention to share our gifts, i.e., passion, talents and abilities and meet our needs and desires at the same time and spreading joy & compassion in the process.  For some, they may not have specific needs or desires at a given time, and that is the desire in itself, i.e., desire to offer their gifts, talents and abilities without anything in return, it is one’s choice or decision, and not the rule or expectation of the group. As we express ourselves, through the circle, describing the details of our gifts (passion, talents and abilities) we choose to share with others (along with our needs & desires, if we choose to share it), we get to hold that space for each other for healing and creation, envisioning that which is being expressed through the circle.

Now the next item that needs clarification is "Gift card", the term used in "Gift card categories".  The gift card is widely used today both in electronic form and plastic card form by retails stores and other businesses offering goods and services.  The gift cards are generally purchased by the sender/giver of "gift" to give to the receiver as a present and the receiver can use it in exchange or payment for the goods and services offered by the business that issued them.  For DSA, our intention is to allow individual members to be able to issue their own gift card for their gifts (passion, talents or abilities) that they choose to share with others while corporation members can bring the gift cards that they purchase from their employer to exchange with other members through DSA GiftXchange. You can be both members of DSA, individual and corporate, if you choose.

The Divine Spark Allies project is to create a mobile application using the latest technology that can provide the role of Gift Exchange Agent (GEA) that can capture what we specify as our needs & desires along with our gifts, talents and abilities we want to share with others, and provide us with the gift exchange option that we can accept or reject. Once accepted, the GEA is also to capture the feedback or review of the gift exchange results, and provide the complete record of transactions for periodic reporting and audit purpose for each participants.

The gift categories that is proposed to be used are given in Appendix-I of my book, Seven Holistic Practices for Harmonious Living, a Self-Healing Journey to Freedom, available in paperbacks and eBook on

To learn more or to RSVP to our next Gift Exchange Meetup, check out

And let us affirm: "I am sharing my gifts, talents and abilities to the fullest and living my dreams", So it is!


Kyung S. Yi-O'Kelly

Your Partner in Our Healing Journey

It's time ...

Posted on December 23, 2017 at 12:50 AM Comments comments (7838)

It’s time …

It’s time to remember and acknowledge who we are and why we are here

It’s time to discover what we really want

It’s time to question all that we do, say, and think

It’s time to go deeper to see the original intentions in all that we do, say and think

It’s time to let go of all that is not serving us to love and heal in peace and harmony


It’s time to choose to be, do and have all that we desire

It’s time we had fun in fulfilling our dreams


Why We Argue...

Posted on September 22, 2016 at 1:00 AM Comments comments (4578)

It was International Peace Day yesterday, and while we observe through the news channels many of the not-so-peaceful events happening out there, most of which we do not have control over, we can still find peace within ourselves and between ourselves & those around us, especially our loved ones.

For many years, my husband and I used to argue a lot, we have very different taste, attitudes/beliefs and habits. As a result, we would disagree frequently and it used to often upset me until one day I saw in the mirror the reflection of another mirror I was holding in front of me, reflecting back and forth in an infinite loop. Then, a flash of insight came to me that it was our own tendency to judge and criticize is being reflected back on each other, in an infinite cycle! And as soon as I removed the mirror, i.e. as soon as I stopped my judgments & criticism of him judging me and criticizing me, we stopped arguing.

And as I created space by observing my own reactions, I noticed that I was the only one that was getting upset from these interactions and not my husband, and then the realization came to me that it was my own desperate need for him to agree with me and to support me that was making me upset, expecting him to be different, unable to accept his criticism for what it is. As soon as I became aware of this desperate need for him to be different within myself and able to heal it and release it, I was able to find harmony in my relationship with him.  

We no longer argue any more, we simply agree to disagree, allowing each other to express our opinions and celebrate our differences!


Who do you see? An old women or a young women?

Posted on June 13, 2016 at 12:00 AM Comments comments (3889)

When you look at the picture above, what do you see? An old women, a young women, or both?


We see ourselves, others and the world around us based on our beliefs and from those beliefs we make assumptions and perceive ourselves, others and the world around us. Is it possible that we have a choice in the way we see ourselves, others and the world around us?


Is it possible that the world we are experiencing is an illusory reflection of our inner worlds combined?

If you find yourself often in conflict with your loved ones or people around you, or even yourself, if you find yourself seeing “what is wrong” with yourself, your loved ones or people around you more often than “what is right” with yourself, your loved ones or people around you,...


I understand this, I understand it because I used to think & feel that way too for most of my adult life. I questioned "why" in everything I was told to do and tried to make sense out of it all and experienced much frustration and anger from being intolerant of others and their ways....


And then it finally came home to me after being reminded of the possibility that each and every one of us are divine spiritual beings who have chosen to be born on Earth to experience a life of adventure and fun, and to experience joy of creation. Pain & sufferings are included as part of the creation process.  But then we arrive here with no memory of whe we really are and there is a veil of forgetfulness.  We forgot that it is a game that we had created; a polarity game with made up rules to experience the extreme opposites and all that comes in between;- good & evil, right & wrong, rich & poor, masculine & feminine, spiritual & physical, yin & yang...and all the other dualities you can think of, it is all part of the game on earth that we helped to create.

Well, there you are, I am passing it on to you! You have been reminded to remember the possibility of who you are and why you are here! 

As divine sparks, our natural state of being is infinite, healing, loving, peaceful, creative and abundant and our individual realities are experienced according to the thought forms projected through our brains and through our actions, i.e. our words and deeds

So then, what is in the way of experiencing our divine natural state of being?

Well, we can imagine, as divine sparks living in a human body, we all have some basic needs;


  • we have physical needs - food, water, air, rest, shelter, touch, and sexual expression, protection from life threatening forms of life: viruses, bacteria, insects & predatory animals 
  • emotional & mental needs - play, challenge, fun, choosing dreams/goals/values & plans for fulfilling one’s dreams/goals/values, celebrating life, mourning loss, finding meaning, self-worth, authenticity, creative expression, acceptance, appreciation, closeness, community, consideration, contribution to the enrichment of life, openness, empathy, honesty, love, respect, support, reassurance, trust, understanding
  • and we have spiritual needs - beauty, harmony, inspiration, order & peace.


And there are some basic feelings that we all experience depending on whether our needs are fulfilled or not.


  • We feel good when our needs are met - Comfortable, Thankful, Confident, Eager, Energetic, Fulfilled, Glad, Hopeful, Inspired, Intrigued, Joyous, Moved, Optimistic, Proud, Relieved, Stimulated, Surprised, Amazed, Touched, Supported
  • but we don’t feel so good when they are not - Concerned, Disappointed, Embarrassed, Lonely, Puzzled, Reluctant, Sad, Uncomfortable, Unsupported.


And like any thoughts & feelings, these feelings are temporary in nature, if we choose to let them go. However, when we choose to keep them, we tend to create more of them. Thus, harboring negative thoughts & feelings invites more negative thoughts & feelings and it tends to trigger negative actions that we invariably regret later.

But when we are deprived of our needs through trauma or abrupt changes in our lives, like sudden loss of our loved ones, unexpected job loss or breakup in our relationships, we may feel much stronger feelings that may be expressed in words here; Abandoned, Discouraged, Distressed, Humiliated, Hurt, Inadequate, lost, Rejected, Upset, Grief, Sorrow, Vulnerable, Terror, Horror, Shock, Unworthy, Worthlessness, Shame, Guilt.

At this point, unless we can train our mind & body to heal and let go of these intense and desperate thoughts and feelings and forgive the perpetrator, they can end up being trapped in our memory and drive us to live in fear, in anticipation of our needs being deprived for the rest of our lives. And these fears may well arouse even stronger feelings than the original feelings triggered from the initial deprivation event; Anger, Aggression, Anxiety, Worry, Confusion, Defensiveness, Desperation, Doubt, Depression, Distrust, Dread, Frustration, Helplessness, Hopelessness, Impatience, Insecurity, Jealousy, Nervousness, Overwhelmed, Panic, Pessimism, Timidity.

Furthermore, when we are unable to forgive and continue to harbor these negative thoughts & feelings, they tend to generate more desperate needs that trigger even more and stronger feelings following the initial deprivation event, creating a spiral effect of negative thoughts & emotions that may end up causing health challenges and/or violence in many cases. In my experience, I found that at the root of these strong feelings are some desperate needs triggered by fear; a desperate need to control others - being intolerant of others and wanting them to change, a desperate need for revenge, a desperate need to condemn, blame and punish the perpetrator, and a desperate need to win at any cost. So until we can heal and release these negative thought patterns & emotions, our inner peace will remain unattainable. It has also been my experience that these thought patterns and trapped emotions get passed down from one generation to the next as well as passed between close family members. 

When we have attained our inner peace by healing all that is not at ease within ourselves, we have attained our wholeness where we are physically energized, mentally focused, emotionally connected and spiritually aligned. And as we feel our wholeness, we are able to recognize the guidance offered by Divine Spirit in choosing our actions to realize our dreams.  

So then, is it possible that our healing journey is simply remembering who we are, restoring our inner light, our divine spark and expanding & growing that light to heal that part of ourselves that is not at ease? And at the same time holding that space for others to do the same? Is it possible when we can let go of those thoughts and feelings that are in the way of the divine natural state of being, we are able choose to experience adventure and fun in realizing our dreams? Perhaps, it may well be possible to choose to create and experience Heaven here on Earth right now! 



Let us forgive! Part II

Posted on December 11, 2015 at 11:55 AM Comments comments (2383)

Let us forgive, forgive ourselves for hurting others! We may or may not have intended it, let us forgive ourselves! We may not have known that we are divine sparks, and we were mistaken to retaliate or may not have been aware that our actions hurt others. Perhaps, we were hurt by a bully and needed to express our hurt feelings. It is easy to blame and become a victim. Perhaps, we were too passionate & overpowering, being a bully as we express ourselves. It is easy being a bully when we are passionate & not aware of others. Let us forgive, forgive ourselves for hurting others! We may or may not have intended it, let us forgive ourselves! Namaste!

Let us forgive! Part I

Posted on December 5, 2015 at 3:10 PM Comments comments (2658)

Let us forgive, forgive those who are hurting us, for they may or may not know who they are, they may have forgotten who they really are and they may or may not be aware that they are hurting us. Let us forgive them and show them by example who we all are, a divine spark of love experiencing life on Earth in a human body. As a divine spark, living in a human body, we all have needs, some more desperate than others, depending on our past life experiences. While we all need to protect ourselves from harms way, we need not retaliate and cause more harm. The act of retaliation is from those who do not know who we are. We can negotiate and find a harmonious solution to all problems we have created as a result of forgetting who we are!  Let us forgive, forgive those who are hurting us, for they may or may not know who they are, they may have forgotten who they really are and they may not be aware that they are hurting us. Let us forgive them and show them by example who we all are, a divine spark of love experiencing life on Earth in a human body.  Namaste!

Love is...

Posted on November 30, 2015 at 8:30 PM Comments comments (5161)

Love is holding on when you feel like letting go

Love is letting go when you feel like holding on

Love is knowing when to choose silence

Love is sincere

Love is kind 

Love is patient

Love is forgiving

Love is gratitude

Love is having fun

Love is now

Love is eternal

Love is You!